Resolutions are for Suckers

Updated: Feb 4, 2020

Here we go, it’s January 1 and its a brand new year. Its a brand new decade, holy shit!

If ever there was a time to make a new year resolution and promise things will be different it’s now right?


Why? Why now?

Oh God, I just pulled into the parking lot of the gym and it is PACKED!

We hate the resolutioners because from now until Martin Luther King weekend its going to be packed…then by Feb 1 it will be only slightly crowded. And by Presidents’ Day Weekend it will be back to normal. Whew, can’t wait for that.

The grocery stores also feel this effect. For a few weeks sales of produce and organic tofu will spike.

Why do we do it?

Starting in January I’m going to:

Get my body back!

Eat healthier!

Walk to work every day!

Not road rage all the way home!

Smile more, and say please and thank you to the dunkys gal!

Write down 3 things I’m grateful for every day!

Starting in January I’m going to __________________! (fill in your own nonsense)

Don’t get me wrong, self improvement is commendable.

Getting into the gym and sweating and burning fat and getting stronger is beneficial in so many ways.

Eating healthier is a must if you don’t. And if you know how to shop right and know a few easy kitchen hacks it can be just as easy as grabbing take-out. Okay that’s a lie but I guarantee the dish I made last night with lean ground beef, black beans, diced tomatoes, Jalapeno, brown rice and broccoli is going to sit better than that BK double whopper with cheese and bacon with onion rings. But they’re so gooood! Until I wake up with heartburn at 3am.

And it only took me 20 minutes to make, and I have leftovers for lunch tomorrow!


You don’t have to be Celebrity Chef Art Smith to know how to make a great meal. Although Sundays are perfect for anything from Healthy Comfort, his award-winning cookbook will help you make amazing, delicious meals that you will love and will help you lose weight.

Sidebar: I don’t know if his Blueberry-peach cobbler qualifies as healthy comfort food, but he made it for me once and it was so good it made this grown man cry. There were witnesses.

But this is really about change.

Creating change in yourself, in your habits and making your life, and yourself happier.

‘Cuz if you are healthier, you are happier, right?


Well, I mean you’ll be glad you’ve lost some bodyfat and that your cardiovascular system is working better. Or that you are stronger than before and can lift more weight and that you can rip out of your shirts like Lou Ferrigno in the Incredible Hulk, if that’s your goal.

But will that make you happier? I don’t know.

I ask you this: have you looked at yourself lately? I mean really looked at yourself.

Look at yourself, look at the inside…

You’re doing all of this in the gym, you’re cooking healthy and eating healthy.

You waved at the paperboy or the doorman or a neighbor and it made them and you smile. That’s all well and good, and completely necessary. What about those gratitudes you are writing every day.

All three of them…

Just 3 of them?

Maybe you need to spend more time there.

Working on your gratitude list.

Maybe you need to spend some time outside.

Working on your gratitude list.

Maybe you need to spend some time looking inside yourself.

Working on self-gratitude.

You’ve seen it on every other facebook post: “2019 sucked, 2020 is going to be my bitch!”

Check back in 2 weeks lets see how that worked out.

I’ve been guilty of that too but then a wise man said to me “hey it wasn’t all bad! What about all the time we spent together in New York? What about that weekend in Ptown? How about that Demi Levato concert you took your kids too? And that bonus you got from work for the project you led successfully, how about that?

Yeah, how ‘bout that?

Life has highs and lows and every low is just a challenge to see how much we can endure and how strong our will is and our constitution is. Its an opportunity to look inside ourselves to see how strong we are in the face of adversity, no matter how that presents itself. Maybe its a setback in the gym, or maybe its the loss of a job or maybe your best friend decided you weren’t worthy of being around him anymore.

I’ve had all three of those happen to me in one year. That sucked.

But you know what didn’t suck? Me.

I found new friends, better friends.

I didn’t find a new job, I created a new career out of what I was really meant to do.

I got back in the gym.

I put the donut down.

LMAO oh my God I had you with that last one for a minute. Those who know me know I’m not walking away from a donut anytime soon! But I can tamper myself and when I meal prep, even with working from home its a necessity, that I can eat well and have healthy meals/snacks and be properly fed for my gym session.

I can also go outside for my morning sunrise walk and be grateful for everything I have and reward myself with the elusive Chocolate Butternut because its a nice sunny day. Or maybe it isn’t, I’m still gonna get the donut, have you met me?

My point here is this…

Look at yourself.

Look inside yourself.

Are you happy with what you see?

Inside and out?

Come on, really?

Even Stepford wives aren’t really happy. I mean if you remember from the movie they’re actually literally robots, and unless you are a robot there is always room for improvement.

New Year’s Resolutions are our way of saying. I need to make improvements.

And we start.

Some of us succeed.

Some of us fail.

Why is that? Topic for another day, but my point today is that resolutions are for suckers because we hang those changes on a certain day. Every change for the better depends on that January 1st start date.

It’s so magical, its a fresh start, a new year, a new me. I’ll eat all the cookies and drink all the egg nog I want cuz I’m gonna kick this year to the curb and start fresh, yasssss kweeeen!!!!

Hard eye roll.

Go back to what I said about looking at yourself. Inside. Then outside.

Let me tell you something, and here is the guts of this post right here:

Look inside and look outside and look deep and long and hard.

But instead of seeing what you don’t like. Try this…

Point out what you do like.

About how great you look for your age.

Bout how your shoulders are kinda full.

About how great it feels to smile and laugh.

About how satisfying it was to finish that book you started over the summer.

About how nice you felt helping the neighbor with her trash barrels.

Whatever…what do you see inside and outside of you that you like. I know, I mean I KNOW, there is stuff there you like.

Now,you need to do 2 things:


Focus on what you like and focus on making them better.

And smile and laugh more, that’s a given.


Start now!

Don’t wait for tomorrow or next week or next month or the goddamn new year!

You want to see change go all NIKE on yourself, get off your ass right now, make a plan, make a list, get to work.


That’s all suckers.

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